if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
