There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
