Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
