I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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