Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
