Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
