So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
