his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
