super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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