Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
