You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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