Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
