Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'm too high and old for this...
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
