highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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