dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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