Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
