i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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