Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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