I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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