their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
