So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
He kissed a someone with a penis
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
