I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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