yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
