Christians are straight up FREAKS
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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