escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
vagina is talking i cant
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Randomize
