I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
