what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
