you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
