Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
