My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
