so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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