the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
