Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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