i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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