I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
