So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
