no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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