If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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