is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
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