His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
