Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
