I'm gonna have a badass scar
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
