My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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