i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
