Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
