I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize