Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
