stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize
