okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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