how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Randomize
